Never Make the First Offer: (Except When You Should) Wisdom From a Master Dealmaker by Donald Dell & John Boswell

Author:Donald Dell & John Boswell [Dell, Donald & Boswell, John]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Business & Economics, Negotiating
ISBN: 9781101133439
Google: ApM-e5iAtmEC
Publisher: Penguin
Published: 2009-08-20T21:17:32+00:00

Look for Common Ground

Another strategy for establishing a personal relationship with a potential business partner is to look for common ground and then make it about the other person. Because I genuinely like people, this is something of a no-brainer for me; I would much rather learn about someone else and find our common ground than talk about myself. (But even if this were not the case, I would find a way of making it so.) Most people, when properly approached, enjoy being asked to talk about themselves or their children. It naturally breaks down barriers and leads to everyone’s being less on guard.

Last year we concluded a deal with ESPN that got quite a bit of publicity; it was for the cable rights to the U.S. Open (for those evening and weekday matches that were not being covered by CBS, which was most of them) for well over $100 million in TV rights fees. I negotiated with a smart, experienced executive, John Skipper, whom I had never met before. We met for the first time for breakfast. I looked for common ground, and immediately detected a Southern accent. I asked him where he had gone to school, and when he said the University of North Carolina, I was able to engage him in a good conversation about my relationship with Dean Smith, about our recruitment of Michael Jordan and other UNC greats, and about my older brother, Peter, who had also played tennis at UNC.

Anyone who overheard our conversation would have said it had nothing to do with dealmaking, when, of course, it had everything to do with dealmaking. It was this conversation that set the foundation for the next six weeks of friendly and productive negotiation and ended in a fair deal for both sides.

Suppose John Skipper had not gone to UNC. Then my hope would have been that he went to school somewhere else where I had a past history. If not, I might have asked him where he grew up or how he got to ESPN. My point is that within four or five questions I can establish common ground with almost anyone—usually it’s someone we both know—and then get the person to open up about himself or herself. It sets the right tone for everything that is to follow.

Also, when meeting someone for the first time or when dealing with someone I don’t know very well, I make it a point to try to keep things light and, if possible, engage that person’s sense of humor. If you make someone laugh, it’s almost impossible for the person not to like you. I’m not talking about a laugh-out-loud joke. That can easily backfire. What I am talking about is something that might elicit a smile from the other party as it relates to the conversation.

Recently I called someone I didn’t know very well, Tony Ponturo, the former executive vice president of Anheuser-Busch Media, the largest buyer of sports television in America. I immediately launched into how

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